New Moon.

I must begin this post by apologising profusely.
I have been so engrossed with everything BUT blogging I haven't even opened this page in months, and I do apologise to those who read what I write.
I genuinely appreciate you guys taking the time to read my stuff, and I will endeavour to remain as loyal to you as you are to me.
Now that the housekeeping is over with, let's move onto another review!

It used to be that twilight was purely a (slightly overlooked) time of day.
I miss those days.

For those of you living under a hole for the last year or two, Twilight is the American tween saga that has (unfortunately) taken over the world. It follows the two main characters Edward and Bella as they fall in love and try to deal with the challenges the world throws at them.
Oh. And Edward's a vampire.
Who REALLY wants to suck Bella's blood.
Which might explain the constipated look he has.
Either way, many young girls now wish for a relationship like the one portrayed in the book. And go utterly mental at the sight of anything even remotely related to Twilight.

The faces of evil

I read the series of books to begin with, and although a half-decent story line the writing was, in my opinion, awful.
It would seem Stephanie Meyer lacked a simple tool every writer should own.

Please. If not for me, for the English language

Apparently the only words she can use to describe Edward (the male lead, and vampire) is "like Adonis" and our lead protagonist Bella (human) is "clumsy".

Now, the first film (entitled simply 'Twilight') was a shambles.
Of course it was a smash hit at the box office, but I can only assume that was due to Robert Pattison being slightly good looking. The acting was wooden and I honestly would have got more emotion out of this chair I'm sitting in.
The second film (The Twilight Saga: New Moon) had a longer title, and a smidgen better cast.
Apparently some of the budget went into acting lessons, as Kristen (Bella) actually did more than pout. Although Robert didn't do much else.
Unfortunately I saw the film Monday, and as it was kinda forgettable I'm running out of things to comment on.
Mike (human) is a school friend of Bella's, but to me he seemed to be around 30. It was creepy.
The end scene was Edward proposing to Bella. Apparently I missed out on all the tweens' reactions as I didn't see the film in the cinema. By all accounts they started screaming at the screen, demanding to know her answer.
I can only assume they don't know what a book is.
The thing that stuck with me was actually Bella's reaction to the proposal. Her stupid, delayed reaction.
It went something like this:
Edward: ...Marry me
*Lots of camera angles*
*Back and forth between the characters*
*I made a drink*
*Built a house*
Bella: *gasps*

What the hell.
Just. What the hell.
I will allow the fact that Bella may be shocked at the proposal, but you wouldn't gasp after about 30 seconds of silence.

All in all, the second film was better than the first.
But that wasn't much of an achievement.

Anyway.
I'm now bored of myself, so I imagine you are too.
Thanks for sticking with me, and I'll speak to you all later.

Quote of the day:
What's wrong with me? What's wrong with you?! Why can't you give me some normal food! You're Scottish, fry something!
Matt Smith as the 11th Doctor

There's only so much a girl can do.

Well. This is balls.

I'm terribly sorry I haven't been chatting as much as I should, but I have so much going on it's hard to take time out to talk to a computer screen.

I'm begining to wish I'd taken a subject I was particually good at, as opposed to the subjects universities want.
Prom is just dragging and the minute I think I've made progress something comes up.
I failed my exams beautifully.
And I can't sort out relationships to f*cking save my life.

I'm getting incredibly grouchy and snappy at my friends, and I'm suprised they're putting up with me in this bitchtastic mood.

I'm so fed up of people forcing us to grow up.
I wouldn't mind so much if it was a consistent thing, but it seems adults want you to be adults when it suits them.
I'm not 18 yet, and I'm only just grasping what a freaking joy that is.
Looking for a car and insurance whilst barely earning more than £50 a month at my chemist job is a joke.
I start to loath people who's parents have brought them a car. I'm glad mine haven't, because there's no way I could ever be described as spoilt and quite frankly, why should they buy me a car?
But people who's parents always get them what they want seem genuinly shocked when you tell them that, heaven forbid, you're paying for this yourself.
Money makes the world go round, as they say.
I wish the world would stop, quite frankly.

I'm use to cooking and cleaning, as Mum has always been insistent that we learn how to fend for ourselves from a young-ish age.
I thank God every day she did, because it's starting to seem that I'm one of the few teenagers out there who can actually cook and work a washing machine.
However, teachers and parents are pushing us so much I think I might break.
They both mean well; teachers want me to reach my potential and parents just want me to be happy.
I just wish they knew that at school I get the same stuff as I do at home.
That's the thing about me, the one thing you can do that will make you want to punch you into next week is keep repeating something at me.
I know my results say otherwise, but I'm not f*cking stupid.
Nagging at me, or telling me in six new and exciting ways you want me to empty the dishwasher will only piss me off.
If someone says "Emily, I need you to put a new load of washing in", I will do it. Well. I will if it's my mother.
What doesn't need to happen is that every five minutes I'm told a certain aspect of how to wash clothes.
I've been doing it for years, I think I can handle it.

Repetition just makes me angry.
There is no other way around it.
Anything said to me more than say, twice that doesn't have some kind of significance will only make me hate you.


I'm sorry that turned into an epic rant, but I've been getting so riled recently I figured I'd use this space and time to get it out of my system.
Hopefully next time I'll have something meaningful to talk about.

Emilé

Quote of the day:
The silicone chip inside her head gets switched to overload
And nobody's gunna go to school today she's gunna make them stay at home
I don't like Mondays - The Boomtown Rats

Ladies and Gentlefolk

As one idea fails, I'm straight onto another.
I have a hand full of friends who are also into this blogging nonsense, and whom I think are lovely.
I may then start allowing guest spots etc on my blog, so it's not just me boring you 24/7.
Give me a shout if you're interested so I can see how to go about this...

Sorry for such a short post, but it's now up to you guys!

OH ALMOST FORGOT.

I have a formsprings account.
It's like an online Q&A, except you can ask completely anonymously, and I have to answer truthfully.
Well...as truthfully as I want really, it's not like the police are gunna monitor what I say.
So, feel free to ask away!
http://www.formspring.me/emilyjanesfb
And I mean anything
I'll answer. Honest.

Quote of the day:
"Oh baby, I'm beating out a samba!"
Cassandra in the Doctor's body

Right...Well...

The pod-cast thing didn't exactly work.
Probably has everything to do with the fact that I'm working with the most rudimentry of tools; I think I heard my Dell chuckle to itself as I plugged in the microphone.

Anyway, news.

I visited East Anglia this weekend on a post-offer open day.
If I get the grades, I think I will definatly go there.
The campus is lovely, the accomodation interesting and the course fantastic.
Anyone else looking to study Biology there next year, give me a shout =]

Half term finished almost a week ago...
What a shit week.
I don't much want to go into detail, but going back to school was the best bit.

REVIEW TIME

Now, the review today is actually a book I've read many times.
The Picture of Dorian Gray by Oscar Wilde
Stephen Fry first piqued my interest about Wilde, so I found a copy of his only published novel, The Picture of Dorian Gray, and set about reading it.
It's a dosie.
Wilde is a genius with words, but the language and themes in the book are a world away from our modern day literature.
The story follows the life of the main protagonist Dorian Gray; an extraordinarily handsome man, and, to a lesser extent, his two friend Lord Henry "Harry" Wotton and Basil Hallward.
Basil is a well-known, but not hugely famous painter who has a chance meeting with Dorian at a social gathering. He is instantly struck by the boy's good looks and over time believes the boy (for he is no older than 20 when we first meet him) is responsible for his improvement in his art. Basil paints a stunning portrait of Dorian, but refuses to exhibit it, claiming he has put too much of himself into the painting, and that anyone who views the picture will see how Basil idolises Dorian.
Without giving too much away, Dorian curses the picture's good looks, even if they are his own, and prays that the picture would age and not himself. This prayer comes true and the novel then looks at the ramifications of this form of immortality.

The book focuses on many themes; love, vanity, mortality, art and language.
Wilde seems to not only offer an addictive story, but also a number of opinions and stances on the aforementioned topics. The prologue, only recently added, focuses purely on art as a medium for emotional release.

Although very challenging to read at times, it is an example of flawless story telling. Not only is the plot a unique one, it also raises interesting questions.
What if us, and us alone, could see our sin displayed before us? While the rest of the world see's only a face of perfection?

But, dear reader, I implore you.
Please, read the book before you watch the film.
It's an age old saying that the book is better than the film, but this is quite different.
The book has more to say than a film ever could.
The beautiful prose Wilde writes does not portray well onto the screen, it can only be enjoyed on paper.

You may also like to know that Oscar Wilde never referred to it as 'The Portrait of Dorian Gray', and I'd ask that you'd do the same.

I believe I have bored you enough, but I must encourage you to read this book.

Emily

Quote of the day:
We can forgive a man for making a useful thing as long as he does not admire it. The only excuse for making a useless thing is that one admires it intensely.
All art is quite useless.
The Picture of Dorian Gray - Oscar Wilde - Preface

I'm sorry it's been so long...

Today I shall be attempting the first of my audio-blogs.
It'll probably be a reading of this, plus some ramblings of things that come into my brain.

As soon as interesting things start happening, this written blogs (blessays as I shall call them, after the lovely Stephen Fry) shall be much longer.

Emily x

Quote of the day:
Listen close to everybody's heart, and hear that breaking sound.
Hopes and dreams are shattering apart, and crashing to the ground
My eyes - Dr Horrible's sing along blog

Tweeple, I call upon you!

Howdy all,

It's been a while I know, but I'm trying to pass my A-levels...
A worthy endevour, I'm sure you'll all agree.

Anyway, moving on.

I would like some advice on an idea I'm toying with.
Once my exams are over, I will be thrown into 'extra-curricular' work. Basically because the teachers are making the most of the year 13s before we leave.
I was pondering if I should do some kind of...audio blog, where I upload a sound file of me chatting with a friend about a topic, or maybe answering questions or discussing with myself.
Basically, I wanted to know if you'd rather listen to me talk to myself, or read me talking to myself.
I like doing both, so I would continue with the blessays (as a certain Mr Fry calls them) along side the audio what-sits.
If it sways the vote, I have quite a posh English accent.

Anyway, drop me a line and I'll see what we can do.

Emily
xx

Quote of the day:
There are more things in heaven and earth, Horatio,
Than are dreamt of in your philosophy.
Hamlet Act 1, scene 5, 159–167

Doctor Who : The End of Time

Now, I cannot claim to be a life-long Dr Who fan. I vaguely remember watching an episode with Tom Baker, but didn't really begin to watch it regularly until Christopher Eccleston took the helm.
However, David Tennant has been, for me, the best Doctor so far.
His lively, cheeky, and rather attractive character has made the show available to many audiences, and his mix of humour, intelligence and morality entertains all.
Which made The End of Time Part I all the more disappointing.

WARNING...HERE BE SPOILERS!

Even with my quite limited knowledge of the Who-niverse, I was left scratching my head wildly.
The return of Galifrey just left me baffled; as far as I was aware the last 5 years of Dr Who was based on The Doctor being the only Timelord left (The Master excluded), the rest having perished in the Time War. In fact, I distinctly remember either Eccleston's or Tennant's Doctor explaining that their entire people had died, and they were unable to return to change the outcome.
Another let-down, was the CGI special effects, which quite frankly were obscene and unnecessary.
Normal this technology is used beautifully, but come on. The Master shooting beams out of his hands? If anyone can genuinely explain this to me, I'd be grateful.
No offence meant to Russell T. Davies, but was he on something?
Our only hope was that it would all be concluded on New Years Day...



It kind-of was.
Although I still don't know HOW Galifrey was still alive, everything was explained.
It was an extremely emotional farewell to David Tennant, and I am not ashamed to say that I, along with many of my friends, cried when he uttered his final line.
For me though, the last 10-15 minutes were the best (I'm missing out that final rubbish, where he went and visited everyone, although his last meeting with Captain Jack was wonderful), with his joy at still being alive quickly changing to his upset at realising he couldn't escape his fate. When Cribbins knocked on the glass to be released, everything fell into place.
The rest, as they say, is history. Emotional, emotional history.

As not only David's but Russell's final outing aswell, I feel Russell may have gone a little over the top.
However, he did humbly end the story lines of all his created characters, allowing Steven Moffat to produce his own Who-niverse.


This post has taken me two days, mainly due to a friend of mine turning up unexpected yesterday looking very cold and covered in snow. Sorry for any inconsistencies, I was distracted with warming up said friend.

I'd love to hear your views on the final episodes.

I shall see you all later.

Emily x

Quote of the day:
There's an old Earth saying, Captain. A phrase of great power and wisdom. A consolation to the soul, in times of need...ALLONS-Y!
The 10th Doctor